dude i'm inner monologue high
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
