i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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