covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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