It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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