We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize