dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
