Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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