why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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