so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Randomize
