Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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