? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Randomize
