The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize