Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(360): View more from Washington

The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(360): The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade. http://tfl.nu/rkoj

Replies (48) Good night (4225) Bad night (562)
Favorite
(813): View more from Florida

I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(813): I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit." http://tfl.nu/z2kp

Replies (64) Good night (7944) Bad night (826)
Favorite
(518): View more from New York

his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(518): his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed" http://tfl.nu/g8fj

Replies (22) Good night (2566) Bad night (4877)
Favorite
(867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(867): lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it http://tfl.nu/o5td

Replies (9) Good night (1699) Bad night (4213)
Favorite
(309): View more from Illinois

Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(309): Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me. http://tfl.nu/c51e

Replies (7) Good night (1080) Bad night (2174)
Favorite
(214): View more from Texas

so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(214): so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat http://tfl.nu/flbd

Replies (3) Good night (2394) Bad night (998)
Favorite
(440): View more from Ohio

im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(440): im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology. http://tfl.nu/d4l9

Replies (14) Good night (3094) Bad night (1490)
Favorite
(402): View more from Nebraska

You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(402): You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement. http://tfl.nu/xw5k

Replies (14) Good night (4436) Bad night (714)
Favorite
(734): View more from Michigan

Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(734): Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props. http://tfl.nu/gfig

Replies (8) Good night (2737) Bad night (791)
Favorite
(402): View more from Nebraska

I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(402): I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out. http://tfl.nu/gdzx

Replies (3) Good night (1973) Bad night (801)
Favorite
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(+44): Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing. http://tfl.nu/5vch

Replies (3) Good night (1845) Bad night (615)
Favorite
(615): View more from Tennessee

A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(615): A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning. http://tfl.nu/fh1x

Replies (5) Good night (1398) Bad night (686)
Favorite
(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(709): I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper. http://tfl.nu/1tdu

Replies (6) Good night (451) Bad night (832)
Favorite
(917): View more from New York City

New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(917): New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward. http://tfl.nu/1xcw

Replies (3) Good night (749) Bad night (371)
Favorite
(615): View more from Tennessee

Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.

(803): View more from South Carolina

Props for using the word nadir

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(615): Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness. (803): Props for using the word nadir http://tfl.nu/i00l

Replies (0) Good night (381) Bad night (770)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: