I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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