Sry I called you an 8
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
