Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
