clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
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