I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize