I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
jump out the window naked night went bad
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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