we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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