My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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