I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
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I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
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we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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