the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I had to cum in my sink.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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