I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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