My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
