Is it because I queefed?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
