Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
