Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
