I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I want to walk on stilts...naked
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
