i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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