You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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