I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
