If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
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