I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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