Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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