We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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