Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
