dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
