Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
