I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
