I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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