Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
