i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
How external is "for external use only"?
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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