Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
