Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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