So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
