honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
