Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Randomize
