she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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