where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Randomize