we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
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