I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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